April 24, 2008

मुक्तक

आज दुई टुक्रा मुक्तक।

'आकाश र समुद्र-१'

पाँच मात्रै किन?! सय इन्द्रियले पिएको हुँ
तिमीलाई पिउन भनेरै,तिमी माथि तैरिएको हुँ
तिम्रो नि:श्वाशको खातमा अडिएको छु म
तिम्रै उष्णताको बलमा क्षितिजसम्म फैलिएको हुँ।


'आकाश र समुद्र-२'

तिमी सधैं नवीन, म उस्तै अधैर्य पर्खिएँ
दिएरै लियौ तिमीले, लिएरै म रित्तिएँ
धर्ती सर्वाङ्ग भिजिसक्यो, अब विवाद किन
तिमी छाल छचल्कियौ या म बादल बर्सिएँ!

9 comments:

  1. "पाँच मात्रै किन?! सय इन्द्रियले पिएको हुँ" - सय इन्द्रियको कल्पना बेजोड लाग्यो।

    अनी
    "दिएरै लियौ तिमीले, लिएरै म रित्तिएँ"
    यो हरफले पुरै मुक्तकलाई 'ज्यान'दिएको छ।
    धेरै पछि रसीलो मुक्तक पढन पाएँ, खुब मजा आयो ।

    ReplyDelete
  2. One more thing (well it is not about this "Muktak") recently I noticed that your blog page takes little long time to load and some other page pup-up's while openning your blog.

    Have you noticed it?, is it due to some third party scripts, gadgets or it is happening only with me.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thank you Badrijee, aakarjee, Deepak Jaditjee and Dilip dai for liking these two pieces.

    Yes Dilip dai, I also feel that, especially taking more time to load. It may be due to third party scripts and gadgets which I am using too manu thinking "घर वरिपरिको जग्गा किन खाली राख्नु?!" Besides I sometimes play with the blog HTML and not being much good in HTML may have done something bad.
    Pop up too is giving trouble, especially in my office computer. But it is OK in computer at home. But the slowness is there at home too.

    ReplyDelete
  4. मलाई अम्बर गुरुङ्गको गीत "म अम्बर हुँ तिमी धर्ती " बोलको मीठो गीतको याद दिलायो । तपाईंको लेखाइमा शब्द र भावनाको बेजोड संगम छ । डा साप को श्रृजना ऊर्जा बढ्दै जाओस् शुभकामना सहित ।
    रबिन
    www.Shrijana.com

    ReplyDelete
  5. Both are really well written! The imagery you've portrayed in both of the poems is glorious. Keep up your good work!

    With warm regards,
    Dibyendra

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thank you Rabinjee and Dibyendrajee!

    ReplyDelete